Emails that irk

There are a few emails that really get to me. The first is the SEO companies that email promising the first page on Google. Does 100% of the internet population on the planet use google for searching? I don't think so. I personally don't think that being on the front page of google is that important as long as you can be found. The reason is, not everything on the first page of google is relevant in a search (I'm sure you've kept browsing to additional pages because you didn't see any description or title in the search results that fit). Not everything you type into google will land you on the front page. I'm on page one for "full service design dayton" and I am for "logo design dayton", "flash design dayton", and "print design dayton". For "web design dayton" I land on page 5. That's relatively not bad considering most of the links will get weeded out because they don't have a business title which looks impersonal. When I get these emails I am so tempted to email back:

Well you found me, didn't you? I must not be that hard to find online.

The next email that gets me mad is when people send me emails and most specifically asking for a job. They always word it "at your company". I'm sorry but when I was looking for a job I went to websites for companies that I would like to work for. I would read the content of the website to get a feel for the kind of workplace it would be (words say a lot on whether the company is youthful and edgy or conservative and refined). If anyone had read my site (even the front page) they would know "my company" is just me, if they read the about page they would know that I have a full-time job, and if they read either the front page or FAQ they would know I am the only one that designs (to save the client cost and to give personal attention). At the bottom of the FAQ it says - crystal clear I might add:

Under no circumstances will I outsource graphic design work (I have received more than one email about people wanting me to outsource offshore and I will NOT have it). I pride myself in doing designs for my clients myself.

For pete's sake READ! So now if you are any of the aforementioned people and wondering why you are reading this, it's because I don't feel like repeating myself.